Update: 10 Random Things

Hello you guise! Welcome to 2014!¬†I know I’ve been gone and it has been a struggle-and-a-half just remembering my password, but I am back and already it feels natural. Like no time has passed; like it was just yesterday. I had so may things I wanted to discuss, to share. Last semester was a nightmarish blur and here I am, on the edge of the real word; staring down the barrel of my last semester ans an undergraduate student. Crap!

As much as I want to get mushy and wax poetic, I just haven’t the time. Here’s what’s been going on in a brief, but informative list.

1. Be true to yourself. Even if/when it hurts you. The truths you stifle and swallow now, will come back as burning bile.

2. I have hair. It’s not what the naturalist-as have it cracked up to be. I miss clippers.

3. Clean up your iTunes; if Fallout Boy doesn’t represent you anymore, it’s OK.

4. Stop saving those clothes for “the right occasion”, you may eventually get fat. Wear a ball gown on campus.

5. It’s HARD to live in two times at once: fulfilling your commitments in one chapter (college), while preparing for another (whatever’s after college, IDK Starbucks!?)

6. I have no idea how to file taxes, and at any rate I’m too poor to.

7. Do what fulfills your soul, what best befits your personal growth path.

8. Growing up sucks BOOTY CHEEKS!!! Big Ole Cherokee (yes, the adult film star, no this is not an invitation to ask me about my business) butt cheeks! … but I wouldn’t (not that I could!) have it any other way.

9. Depression is REAL! (yes, this includes black folks) … but so are all the reasons not to be. ūüôā You can’t do any of the things I mentioned if you can’t forgive yourself first.

10. Pick a role model; for deep reasons, for shallow reasons, for career advice, or how to learn the eyebrow-concealer trick! Have a few, have a bunch, but always be wanting MORE from yourself and life. Enlist the help of someone who can show you how! You are worth it!

I missed this space, this freedom. I will try not to leave you guise for so long. I was away, but I can bring you too!

Nancy Not-So Negative

P.S. LEAVE ME ALONE PHONE!! I’m threatening to move into a cave!

Hi … My Name is Nancy.

Negative, Nancy (In my best Sean Connery voice). All throughout middle and high school, people called me Daria. It would be years before I properly understood the reference. And yes. I am very much like her, olive-green jacket, army boots and all.

Except college has no lockers.

By the way this is an absolutely thrilling show about the travails of a young woman finding herself in the midst of consumerism,  pop culture, and peer pressure.

BLAH BLAH BLAH  Daria = cartoon Roze!!!

That being said, there always seems to be this cloud following me. And instead of being lined with silver  it occasionally rains asbestos. [I HATE clouds!!!]

Why is my life such a fart, you ask? {I have no idea how to punctuate that. Kudos to you,¬†public¬†school.} Mostly for a series of reasons I have concocted entirely on my own. It’s like¬†A Beautiful Mind,¬†except instead of making up secret¬†operatives¬†and¬†omnipresent¬†best friends, I hallucinate reasons NOT to be awesome. And then I ask strangers why they can’t see them. {If you¬†haven’t¬†seen this movie, EXIT! BLOG! NOW!!!}

Here’s a few of my hallucinations:

1.¬†EVERYONE¬†around me is in a relationship. … FALSE. It’s just hard to¬†ignore¬†obnoxious¬†Siamese¬†twins that spam Instagram with¬†their¬†organ-sharing¬†gaiety.

2. The government is slowly stealing hours from the day. … FALSE. There are 24 of them, I counted once while “studying” for a final.

4. Discipline and perseverance will guarantee¬†success¬†in academia. … FALSE. … School is a trap engineered by alien scientists to stop us from¬†building¬†pyramids and communing with our ancestors.

… no wait, that was a real hallucination. I’m so sleepy…

5. I will never accumulate enough¬†awesomeness¬†in my mortal¬†body to¬†rival the likes of Beyonc√©, Oprah, and Olivia Pope. … TRUE. [Can’t really contest that.] GAWD!!¬†Scandal¬†is cocaine and Shonda Rhimes is my PUSHER!!!

6. Professors think I’m only taking one class. HOW DARE your class need 6 textbooks!! I have 4 other like-minded instructors. I spend more time a day reading than Bobby Brown does trying to make his teeth touch! I have calluses on the index finger and¬†thumb¬†of my right hand, like I work out with q-tip¬†dumbbells!

I can’t really think of anything else…

I keep asking my peers for bits of motivation, hoping I’ll stumble upon some golden truth that will cause all my chakras to¬†align¬†and I’ll ascend into¬†heaven¬†like Ray Lewis after the Superbowl. But that won’t happen. I won’t become a productive super saiyan overnight.

AAARGGHH!!! I just wanna wake up awesome one day.

The¬†score¬†will read Roze: 1 Life: 0. I currently reads an imaginary number for me. Like negative “i” or something as equally Ludacris. {That man will FOREVER taint the spelling of that word. Him and Fabolous}

I forget what I’m talking about. I’m tired! Bye!

… Apparently I over-use the word awesome. I’m getting help.

Dormtainment is SO Funny!

Fell in love with Dormtainment a long time ago and this is their latest web video. I give it 5 stars on the hilarity scale. Everyone raps, Mike is shirtless, and Tay is wearing a Kangol hat… what more can you ask for!? Everything they make is FIRE. It’s a parody of 1980s rap with a positive message and few of their classic antics.
“Old School Jam”
Wha-what-what hey hey! Wha-what-what-what Ho HOOO!!! (watch the video in 280p for a more authentic “You MTV Raps!” feel) Watch, enjoy, repeat!
Don’t forget to watch the rest of their videos at¬†www.dormtainment.com
Roze