Marie Kondo that Vision Board!

You’re likely stuck in the house. Time is melting away, and you’re clinging like hell to the remnants of your sanity. Order has gone, and the police are trapped in the sewers. A charismatic villain is occupying your living room.

Nope, that’s Batman!

If you’re not in a Christian Bale film, you’re likely social distancing, and spending way more time at home. This means you have the opportunity to update (or create ) your very own vision board.

Whether you’re using this time to learn a second language, start a new business, or just rest and connect with yourself , you can do with a bit of DIY, mindfulness, and spring cleaning!

Goals change. They should. They will. Your vision board(s) should change along with them. My old vision board was littered with lists and quotes that no longer applied. Offer letters for positions I left, and remnants of opportunities I once wanted. I even left space for new goals and unexplored terrain. Roze: The Final Frontier!

I was younger then. I’m wiser now. Now I’m looking down a path toward professional academia, my goals are changing, and the map will need match my destination. I’m currently “funemployed” (a term I made up to reclaim my time and denounce my ties to capitalism-driven productivity and burnout) and working to one day be FUNemployed!

In other words I’ve been social distancing since January; less by choice, than force. More safety and frugality for me, yay!

So, while our nation seems to be on the edge of a real-life purge, careening dangerously towards the themes of the 2006 comedic sci-fi film Idiocracy, we can still work to refine our goals, and update your vision board. What goals have you achieved? Revamped? Reassessed? Have our priorities changed? How has the Corona Virus made you rethink your future!? a vision board is an opportunity to Get creative and post your plan where you can see it. Probably on your fridge!

We can get through this together, and come out better.

Thug-olutions: New Year, Essentially the Same Me

I’m a thug [read emotionally intelligent and proactively self aware individual]. Thugs don’t make resolutions. They are everyday attempting to review and renew in order to rise from their ashes and reveal and shiny new self [see also Phoenix]. Thugs don’t wait until January 1st. CLEARLY they wait until The 5th! In my defense, I began working on these months ago. I’m sharing with you in the hopes of getting a few accountability partners.

My New Years Thug-olutions (featuring some help from Instagram and a Buzzfeed post I read) are as follows:

1. You owe it to yourself to research your passions. Don’t bury them; unfulfilled and sitting silent in the soul like seeds seeds waiting in dormancy.  

2. Enjoy your own company. Stop linking your enjoyment of experiences to the company of others. Friends can make good times better, you always have the company of your closest friend… You!

3. Get out of your head! Sometimes im so cerebral, it’s like playing chess with people that don’t know they’re in a tournament. Just open your mouth. Tell people what you want/think/need/feel. Those who matter don’t mind, and those that mind don’t matter!

4. Save some money! You’re 25 years old! Have something to show for it!

5. Take care of your body! It’s the vehicle by which you experience this wonderful three dimensional world! Be a good steward!

Drink some water! Go to sleep on time!

6. Talk good to yourself. Make YOU feel good! Flatter the person in the mirror.

7. Take responsibility for your part in relationships that have failed. I don’t mean get stuck in the past, but there are things you can learn from it. You’re not just the victim, you’re also a perpetrator … in part. You allowed that person to enter and remain in your presence. Make a list and act on the top three steps (you don’t know them because they’ll be the things you repeatedly failed to do).

For me they are

a. Ask hard hitting questions that get at the heart of others’ intentions. Friends and loved ones may struggle to find the words, but not hesitate or attempt to deceive.

b. Be happy in/of your self so that arguments and discord in particular relationships don’t make your whole life feel like a failure.

c. Take responsibility for your interactions. Be conscious of how your speech/interaction style affects others and what it says about you. Be honest, I think long-term, think about what you want from that person and your relationship with them.

Happy New Year, lil’ thugs! Go forth and prosper!

Roze Goes. The blogger formerly known as “Not-so-Negative, Nancy”

The Ketchup

For my upcoming birthday I am giving myself success… or at least opportunities to attain it. I interviewed Friday and spoke with my soon-to-be-employer; she’s super enthusiastic to have me start immediately. I’m attempting … {cringes] to date.  I’m looking into grad school options, and doing a lot of personal inventory. Finally, as it pertains to this blog, I plan to establish a schedule for posting. Here goes:

Sunday (bi-weekly): The Ketchup

Thursday: List/Rant

Any Other Day: Reposts

Ok, so for this bi-weekly Ketchup I’ll fill you in on whats been filling my headspace..

There is no such thing as a big break! (I know, SHOCKING!) For many of the fields in which I have interest, a “famous” person could “put me on”. They could stumble across my work and immediately see value in it. But how, I query, will they see me if I am not yet a big enough stumbling block? I need to be a huge, obtrusive, stub-your-toe, unignorable cinder block. Without that work what would it matter? If I did meet the right person? What do I have but a head full of ideas without a body of work to support it?

Depression is like chronic ringworm, but thankfully motivation is like showering.

I WILL NOT tolerate people that don’t respect the sanctity of a relationship. Let me explain. If you hit on me and you’re in a relationship, I will SMITE you. Done. Worse still, are the people (I’m sure men and women are guilty, but as I am a Hetero woman, it comes from guys) who insist that a friendship could be maintained, or that friendship was their initial intent {viscous side eye}. Here, take my hand. Please allow me to guide you onto the path that will illuminate EXACTLY where you had me messed up! Take an everlasting musical chairs tournament worth of seats!

(I’m mad all over again… smh)

In parting I leave you with this. If you listen carefully, you can shake you bom-bom and be joyously inspired!

Negative, Nancy … now Roze Goes. (Get it, because life is an adventure?

Return of the Mack

You know what’s really $#!^!? Resentment. It creeps up on you quiet like a sudden allergy. Out of nowhere something you once enjoyed is intolerable. Your throat itches, you break out in hives, and just the sight of it turns your stomach. I am sick… with resentment for this part of my life. I LIVE in the unfathomably uncomfortable crevice between a seemingly immovable rock and a Russian-prison-type hard place. I am a grown up, or so they tell me. But I seem to be failing miserably. I have no job, I dread calling my mother because my dreams are nebulous and I can’t even explain them to myself. That does not fly with Jamaican moms, or any moms really. “What are you waiting for!? Do you want a dream job or do you want to make a living!? You didn’t go to college to stay on someone’s couch!” On that we can agree. This isn’t what I worked for, dream about. My dreams aren’t concrete. I can hardly decipher them. I’m growing and changing every day, I hardly have a grasp on myself. I want everything, and in pursuing a handful of stars, I have nothing but air trapped in weak fists. The fight is mostly in my head. With faceless naysayers chasing me in a hamster wheel. Run Roze, run. To nothing, from nothing, to nowhere.

IDK, I guess I’m back or whatever.

Roze Goes